Maddie’s sitting on a chair by a desk in the corner of the lounge area of the studio flat. The landline phone she’s just been using is situated to the left of an Apple Mac laptop.
MADDIE
(looking down at Bertie who’s asleep on the kitchen area lino)
Hey Bertie boy!
The dog wakes, pricks his ears up and looks up at Maddie.
MADDIE
Guess what?
Bertie slowly sits up, tail wagging.
MADDIE
(speaking to Bertie in a baby voice)
Daddy’s got a little dick!
Bertie wagging his tail even more furiously.
MADDIE
(clapping her hands)
Yes, he has! He’s finally realised that he’s not the stud he thinks he is.
Bertie barks, gets to his feet. Maddie then stands up and heads towards him.
MADDIE
Let’s get you some supper, shall we?
Bertie barks again and spins round in a circle. Maddie picks up his bowl, places it on the right-hand side sink draining board and opens a hip-height cupboard, withdrawing a plastic container. By this time, Bertie’s sitting by the space left by the absent bowl and is sitting patiently, waiting for his food. Opening the lid, Maddie removes a handful of dried dog food, replaces the lid and container to the cupboard. She then walks to the fridge, removes a half-full pouch of dog food and squeezes the contents, like a toothpaste tube, into the dog’s bowl. With his ears up, Bertie sits patiently as Maddie places his bowl on the floor in front of him. He looks at the bowl, then at her. After a pause, she speaks.
MADDIE
OK.
Bertie lurches towards his bowl and wolfs it down like he’s never been fed before.
MADDIE
(smiling)
Oh, you poor starved animal.