SCENE NINE - IN WHICH A VERY PLEASANT HOUSE MEETING TURNS
DISASTEROUS WITH THE ARRIVAL OF AN UNEXPECTED, AND QUITE
UNWELCOMED, GUEST

CAT'S MEOW, IBCF, SHADOWKAT, PURPLE PANDA, PURPLEFINCH,
JADESTONE, OXLIN, CANIX and HYPATIA are all sitting on
various armchairs and beanbag chairs scattered around the
Spector House main room. ALICE is lying in a hospital bed
along one wall. There is a big, furry rug in the middle of
the room, a huge window with a windowseat along the back
wall that opens onto a view of clouds, and piles of paper
and pencils all around the room. ROSANNE SPECTOR is sitting
on the windoweat.

CANIX
All right, this Spector house
meeting has begun! First we will
start off by singing the Spector
House Song.

CAT'S MEOW raises her hand

CAT'S MEOW
What if we don't know the words?

PURPLE PANDA
Oh, just make them up as we go
along. That's what we always do.

PURPLEFINCH
It's an exercise in creative
thinking and rhyming.

OXLIN
Somebody makes up the first line,
and then each person after them
makes up a line after that.

CANIX
And, of course, it has to make at
least a little bit of sense.

IBCF
Oh, great.

ROSANNE SPECTOR
I'll start you guys off.
In a land, not far away.

JADESTONE
In this very time.

OXLIN
There exists dear Spector House

CANIX
Foe of reason, friend of rhyme

CAT'S MEOW
With full notebooks and sharp
pencils

PURPLE PANDA
The pen will prove mightier than
the sword

PURPLEFINCH
In Spector House the sharp of mind

IBCF
Will never end up bored

ALICE
When others try to top Spector
House

HYPATIA
They never pass the test

SHADOWKAT
The creativity of Spector House

ROSANNE SPECTOR
Will always be the best!

Everyone claps and smiles.

ROSANNE SPECTOR
Now-

Suddenly the entire building starts shaking and a chocolate
bar flies in through the window. Once it hits the floor the
building immediately stops shaking. The chocolate bar lies
on the floor, vibrating ever so slightly. Everybody else in
the room just stares at it openmouthed.

PURPLE PANDA
Did a chocolate bar just fly
through our window?

IBCF
The building shook too. Or did I
imagine that part?

ROSANNE SPECTOR
No, you didn't imagine it.

CANIX
Let me take a look at this
chocolate bar.
(He walks over to it, and
picks it up)
Yeeouch! It's hot!

PURPLEFINCH
(Suspicious)
And it hasn't melted yet? Very
suspicous...

The chocolate bar starts shaking violently and a loud
beeping noise fills the air

THE CHOCOLATE BAR'S VOICE
EXPLODING IN 10...9...8...

HYPATIA
Exploding? Did it just say it's
exploding?

THE CHOCOLATE BAR'S VOICE
...7...6...5...

IBCF
It's not a chocolate bar! It's a
time bomb! Get it out of here!

THE CHOCOLATE BAR'S VOICE
...4...3...2...

CANIX
If this doesn't stop it, nothing
will!

CANIX grabs the chocolate bar, winces in pain, and throws it
out the window. Everybody rushes to the window to see what
happens, but about a foot out the window the chocolate bar
pauses, and then starts flying back in. It lands in the
exact spot it was on before, and then explodes, leaving a
large charred spot in the middle of the rug.

CANIX
That was unexpected.